There's no "win" in my piece, Trixie, that's for certain. I prefer the version of the Selkie myth in which the man does not intentionally entrap the woman, but I don't know any versions in which they live happily ever after.

I agree with you entirely that if it's possible to shapeshift and transform and live in two elements together, collaboratively and freely, that is beautiful and best. I have a much clearer sense of how that would look now, and I am willing to do that as much as I can. This story is about how I failed to do it before, and about the loss I felt, and still feel.

I must not have expressed it very clearly, but this loss opened my eyes in a new way to the degree that relationships can be experienced as a trap. I would certainly have thought that true of manipulative or coercive or even codependent relationships. But as you imply in your comment, it can be as simple as not honoring each other's true nature, which in our case stopped far short of a sense of possession. That's what I did not understand (and she now says that she did not understand everything that was happening, either, but she felt it) and that's what I was trying to express.

Thanks for reading and responding. I appreciate you.